Issues

I gotta lay down some thoughts/trials that I am facing at this time.

I am having issues in dealing with many aspects in my life that are detrimental to my faith if I do not handle them accordingly.

First, I miss my kids. My own flesh and blood. My highlight of my week; seeing my girls and not being able to hold them. But, what makes it more difficult is... knowing that they are suffering at the same time not being able to see their daddy. It is as if they are now nonexistent to me; like they are fake or not real. They were prominent in my life and now they are gone- just like that. It is hard for me to talk to them because...... I can't see them and it is hard for me not to be there as they are growing up.

I cry out to my Lord in pain as my eyes water. I had at one time, peace in this situation- but that has passed. In what ways can God restore my situation. I think that there are several situations in the bible that correlate to mine. Job. Joseph. David.

I have had this questioning in me- Is God in control??? Well.... I opened a box that I got from my wife's house. In there was a book from Charles Stanley called "Is God in Control?" Albeit, that is what I am looking for. So I read about half of it today, applying the book and thoughts and scripture to my life/situation. I am so glad God has brought this into my life (I have no idea where it came from).

Second, I had put up a wall of defense. I am tired of being abused and taken advantage of verbally. I have lost self-esteem in this matter and out of frustration, WILL NOT PUT UP WITH IT. My dad, mother and wife.